So Momma catched me eatin' a plate a butter today and she sayed mean things like gross and disgustin' when she beed wipin' my face with a smelly rag. Which, that ain't a very proper way to talk at a young doggie. I sayed, please don't judge and condom me on this one foolish mishap, Momma. I is much more than this plate a butter. So much more. I loves you, Momma. JUST kiddin'. I heared stuff like that on Oprah, is all. I just letted her yell. I prawly won't get no liver snaps for a few days.