I eated the Elf On The Shelf's eyeballs today acause he has beed spyin' on me; an' he prawly were gonna tole Santy for to jus' give me a ole rock in my sock. Then Betsy gotted to cryin' all over the place an' Momma gotted mad; an' I hadda go sit in my room an' think about my own self. An' guess what? I did done that thinkin'; an' I thunk up a great idea. Which, that bees... TA-DAAA... Boxer In A Bag! I sayed, see Betsy? You don't gottsa cry no more acause the Boxer In A Bag gonna be watchin' out for Santy now. She, sayed, you is a idiot, George. So I tole her, that bees okay. Santy jus' don't brings toys for bad childrens, he gots no problems 'bout bringin' presents to idiots. So there! An', plus, you prawly better wanna be a little bit nicer to the Boxer In A Bag.